my Movie

Movie Details

Title:   Johnny Firecloud
Director:   William A. Castleman
Year:   1975
Genre:   Exploitation
Times Seen:   1
Last Seen:   09.17.05

Other Movies Seen By This Director (0)

Notes History
Date Viewed Venue Note
09.17.05Alamo DowntownThis Screening is part of event: QT6
So here's the funny thing about this screening, the last screening of the entire fest. Tarantino was gone. Nobody seemed to really know where he was off to, no one really knew if or when he was coming back, he just sort of disappeared at some point. and was never really heard from again. So i guess I've now seen a movie that Tarantino hasn't... that officially makes me eligible for a hardcore filmgeek badge and secret decoder ring, right?

Anyway, Tim got up and intro'd the film instead and did a great job of it. he also called for a show of who had made it to every show of the fest. I proudly started clapping and although I was surrounded by AICN people so it made it seem like there were a lot of us, Micah's (he was sitting a few rows back) write-up mentioned that there was really only about a dozen of us. Not even Tim made it to all of them, citing BMX Bandits as his downfall. He then called for a show of the all-but-one club and got some more applause (many yelling "Madman Marz" excuses... weaklings.) Tim: ah yeah, Madman fuckin Marz... did anyone actually like that movie? (I actually did) You guys are high or stupid or something. I've got news for you... you watch it again and you'll find out that movie sucks!

I call that just a little bit of jealousy for not making it to all the showings, but Tim's a cool guy so I'll let that go.

So Tim continued with his intro, calling Johnny Firecloud a rip-off of Billy Jack made by the great David F. Friedman, basically making a bloodier, dirtier, nastier versions of movies that make a lot of money.

The movie was pretty much that. There was a great scalping scene along with a few other cool death idead (a bag full of rattlers!) but before it could get to that we had to sit through a lot of rednecks making fun of indians and indians arguing about whether or not their culture sucks. The main guy, Johnny Firecloud, was pretty built but insisted on wearing these really tight pants with this totally cinched up belt which made him look flabby. He's constantly angry at everyone even though big-breasted women want him, including an absolutely beautiful Native American girl who actually gets raped TO DEATH. I'm not sure exactly how much rape it would take to cause death, but it must be a lot, and she must have gotten it.

Easily the most interesting character of the movie is not Johnny Firecloud or the big rich redneck who own's the town but the police dude with the dirty secret that keeps him on the rich guy's leash. There's a scene in here where he sits at his desk and has a sort-of quit breakdown/tears-of-rage sort of thing that... I have to say, was a real moment. It felt like it deserved to be in a better movie, or maybe it was still pretty bad but just better than everything else, at 3:30am who can tell. Anyway, he's gay, or maybe not, but in any case he got discharged from the military for being gay. This calls us back to an earlier line where one of the rednecks confronts him in a bar and says "One of these days you and me are gonna tangle assholes!" Drew (AKA Moriarty) after the movie: I don't think that means what you think it means, man. You should maybe rethink that before you go around saying it again.

In another emerging pattern though, there's a scene with some of the best camel-toe I've seen in recent history. It mirrors Funeral Home's nicely.

I think the only other good moment of the film comes when Johnny Firecloud's getting back at the big rich redneck. Instead of killing him, he ties him up and whips the shit out of him (because of course he was whipped earlier, blah blah blah) and has him strung up to hang with his feet barely standing on the ground and connects with a solid punch right to the balls. The rich redneck guy then proceeds to try and scrunch up his legs in pain but then starts hanging and has to bring his legs down to the ground but hurts so much he can't so he's thrashing around trying not to choke as he deals with his nutpain. Pretty cool.

Other than that, the movie doesn't end with a death or even a showdown but a wussy psychotherapy session between Johnny Firecloud and the gay cop on that pile of rocks that they use for every movie (a joke was made of it in Bill & Ted's Bogus Journey when they're watching a Star Trek episode and the evil B&T robots then tae the real B&T to the same formation to throw them off and kill them). All of this talk of feelings and knowing who you are and where you're going pretty much killed any sort of excitement or energy I had for this film. At that point it was just 4 in the morning and Quentin had already left.

Through the whole night I was feeling pretty sad since this was the end. Sure spending every night at the Alamo was sort of getting to me (there was a bug that was going around that I was just waiting to catch, my ass was sore, and I had a paranoid fear that all of the assorted BOs were attaching themselves to my clothes and stuff), but after this final film there was a pretty positive feeling of making through to the end. 27 films, 1 TV show, and 2 encores in 9 nights = pretty epic. I'll have Weird Wednesday's to revisit some of this kind of feeling though, and upcoming festivals to hopefully see everybody again. I do have a fear that I won't get a badge to the next QT fest - selling out in half an hour is really hardcore - but hopefully something will work out. Hopefully there will be another one, and in less than four years too. After saying goodbye to everyone and sauntering out into the completely deserted streets of 4:30am Austin, i got in my car and headed home to bills and garbage and an empty refridgerator and all the other pains in the ass that real life creates. I didn't get a ticket for the Firefly marathon going on today at the Alamo so i'll actually have to stay home tonight. i wonder what that will feel like.
  You can use this form to send me an email. Name and E-mail Address fields are optional, but in order to prove that you are not a heartless spam robut, you must answer this simple movie trivia question.
???: What's the movie with the killer shark where Roy Scheider says "We're gonna need a bigger boat?"
E-mail Address: