|Title:||Luther the Geek|
|Director:||Carlton J. Albright|
Other Movies Seen By This Director (0)
|10.05.05||Netflix|| Ok, this is a movie about biting the heads off chickens... but what I don't get is that Luther also talks like a chicken and acts like a chicken, peeking his head and buck-buck-bucking through the whole movie. He chews the necks out of more humans than he bites the heads off chickens so is he a really a geek? I don't know.|
and by the way, this is REALLY what the movie's about. I'm not making it up or anything. The dude really bucks like a chicken through the whole thing, and even gives a rooster call whenever he kills someone.
What I want to know more about are the idiots who let this guy out of the loony bin. The dude can't even talk, he eats raw eggs and tries to kill everyone he sees... i don't see how parole is an option.
I guess the only thing i learned from this movie is this: if someone offers you an egg, you better take it.
P.S. not really attached to this movie but this happened tonight and is movie-related although it wasn't a full-length screening so i can't give it an entry here. However, since this is my movie journal, I'm gonna talk about the Full Moon event I went to tonight.
Charles Band is the president of Full Moon Entertainment, and anyone who is familiar with that name knows what I'm talking about. Puppet Master, Trancers, Dollman, Subspecies... Band, along with Roger Corman and Loyd Kaufman, is really keeping the exploitation horror alive in this day and age. He's made like over 200 movies or something, it's just crazy. I bet almost half of the movies in the Horror section of my local video shop from middle/highschool were Full Moon titles... most of them are really horrible of course but they're also fun. Band's particular fixation with evil/demonic dolls and toys and little people is a mixed breed of creepy and really cool. I totally wanted to be the Puppet Master for like 3 years and have those little dudes that could drill into people's heads or slash their Achilles heel and whatnot.
Anyway, Band is hitting the road in a grassroots effort to raise awareness since even the most minor print or TV advertising is now financially impossible for him. The show is a lot like hanging out at Band's house while he shows you random cool things. He had a reel of not-yet-huge movie stars getting their start in his movies, behind the scenes effects work, trailers, tv bits, etc. etc. interspersed with anecdotes from him, stories, mini-rants, all kinds of stuff. He even brought his i-guess famous rock star son out to sing like three songs (Alex Band, who was in The Calling... who knows). He also showed a trailer for an upcoming release that just HAS to be a modern classic. It's called Gingerdead Man and it's about a killer (Gary Busey) who gets killed, cremated, and accidentally baked into a gingerbread cookie. He then comes to life and starts killing people, saying lines like "Eat me you punk bitch!" It was awesome.
He also talked about being approached to make Halloween whatnots and inventing a line of halloween bras, which two HOT girls modelled for us. One had bloodshot eyeballs, one had Rocky Horror-esque lips, one had vampire skulls, and one had larger breasts attached over the actual bra. In the beginning, Band explained that the show would basically include the three main pillars that interest him: blood and gore, weird dolls and puppets, and hot chicks. He didn't really disappoint on any of them.
Later in the show, he brought up a few members of the audience and directed a short scene where a monster rips a hot girl's top off. I mean nothing was shown, but it was equally cool and funny to see him conduct non-actors quickly to accomplish the scene on stage. There was also a drawing where you threw your business card into this coffin and he randomly picked a winner to appear and get killed in a new Full Moon movie. I didn't win.
Toward the end he auctioned off 4 original puppets from various movies (one dating all the way back to Stuart Gordon's Dolls went to this super hot blonde chick with dreadlocks for 60 bucks!)... I think Harry got one of them... oh and the winner of the get-killed-in-a-movie contest got another one...
Perhaps what got me most excited however, was that Band announced a special scam/gimmick/opportunity that he's doing with his next movie: Petrified. Basically, he explained, you look at a lot of these Hollywood directors and producers (Scorses: dwarf. weird looking dwarf. Coppola: mellowed now but when he was younger, total terrorist. Tarantino: straight out of bizarro world) and said how if Tarantino came up to a girl and was just a 7-11 employee she would tell him to fuck off, but since he's a powerful guy in hollywood now, he always has a hot chick on his arm (it's true.. the girl he brought to QT6 was like, taller than him and model-hot)... so everybody in LA tries to play off that they're producers so they can get tail... but most of them are faking so when the girls search their name on imdb, they see through the lie. WELL, The ever-innovative Charles Band announced that for everyone that spent a hundred bucks on the Full Moon merchandise (they had tons of it, DVDs, t-shirts, statuettes, toys, you name it), they would get attached to Petrified as an executive producer... which means they'd get their name in imdb.com and also, the movie would be in the Guinness book of world records for having the most executive producers ever. nice!!! 6 DVDs and a bronzed statuette of Blade commemorating the Roadshow later, I am a producer. Now all I need is a casting couch.
So it was a pretty fun event, I'm very glad I went. It made a GREAT precursor to FantasticFest... but now I have to hit the hey and sleep in till 12 or 1 tomorrow in preparation. 4 days, 19 films... get ready.